ugh

I won't say I'm depressed, though. It's just that most things in my life are pretty much out of control. Even worse, some of them are even out of my reach. I pretty much have been spending most of my time trying not to think about it but don't we all think of chocolate pudding when we start to get hungry during our so-called-diets? Well, I know I do.

Well, you can say that I am bad at handling problems. I like my life calm and undisturbed but obviously, where's the fun in that, right? I over-think. I overreact. Heck, I'm an emotional train-wreck, I'd say. And I'm lost, too. I don't know where to start over and I'm pretty sure that if I do get a chance to start over, I'd do it the same way. And as much as I hate it, I truly don't know who to talk to. My friends are great but I just can't bear the fact that they might tell me something I don't even wanna hear. And let's not even start on my ego hahah

Truth is, what I'm going through right now is trying to kill me. Except that it doesn't. It gives me sleepless nights and a lot of crying at 2 am - which I hate very much, I look like a zombie, thank you.

On the bright side, since it doesn't kill me, I guess I can handle this. I'll stop thinking about it. Soon. Or maybe in two weeks. Or two months. Probably a year, but I'll get over it. So, I guess I'm sorry for such a long, crappy rant. I'm just sick of crying when I end up not being able to handle it. I'll be fine, though. Trust me. I always turn out okay most of the time.

"God does not burden a soul more that it can bear."